Tuesday, May 5, 2015

The Top 40 Kinks

One enterprising social scientist at The Guardian has done an exhaustive summary of porn searches, coming up with a list of the top 40 kinks / fetishes of we, the people. They are, in order:

1. Bondage
2. Female Domination
3. Foot Fetish
4. Tickling
5. Face Sitting
6. Smoking
7. Hand Jobs
8. Foot Worship
9. Blow Jobs
10. Trampling
11. Masturbation Instruction
12. Foot Jobs
13. Ball Busting
14. Pantyhose
15. Farting
16. Foot Domination
17. Amateur
18. 18 and 19 year olds
19. Balloons
20. MILF
21. Humiliation
22. Mixed Wrestling
23. Lesbian
24. Interracial
25. Masturbation
26. CBT
27. High Heels
28. Superheroines
29. Cat Fighting
30. Big Tits
31. BDSM
32. Spanking
33. Panty Fetish
34. Giantess
35. Pedal Pumping
36. Ass Worship
37. Anal
38. Female Wrestling
39. Strap-On
40. Female Training

The list is an interesting snap-shot of humanity in its own right. It also leads to several observations:

1. There are some really, really scary people in the world.

2. There are more than a few things above that you really wonder how they excite anybody. Smoking? Balloons? Farting? Oh my. I half expected to see Great Danes up there.

3. There are surprising number of things in the above list that I just have no clue to that which they refer. And after looking up one of them (CBT), I am not looking up any of the rest.

4. Some of the above don't even qualify as kinks. I mean, 18 and 19 years olds, MILF's, and bit tits? That stuff is the equivalent of a hamburger and fries at a fast food restaurant.

5. Superheroines? Oh my, nerd fantasies run wild. That said, now that I think of Elastigirl . . . ahem, never mind.

6. How in the world did cunnilingus not make the top 40? Did they not ask Hillary or most any heterosexual man?

7. Given the popularity of 50 Shades of Gray among women, I was not surprised to see bondage at the top of the list. That said, I have never run into a woman in the real world that seems to enjoy any of that. So I take it bondage may well be the purest form of fantasy.

8. I lead a very boring life. . . .

Okay, let's go to Bill for the judge's reaction to the list:

Apparently, he approves.


Bookworm said...

I was curious about "trampling" (no. 10), which sounds vaguely like something that happens if you fall down while being chased by stampeding cows, but after following your lead and looking up CBT (oh, my God!), I too was afraid to explore any further. I'm beginning to think there's a lot to be said for being boring. At least you don't end up with lasting scars or embarrassing emergency room visits.

GW said...

I looked up "trampling porn," after your comment, and yes, not only is your guess correct, but to go one farther, it seems to have enjoy some intersection with CBT. Whooooooaaaa. Nightmares tonight, I think. And embarrassing emergency room visits indeed.

GW said...
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