Green Porn

She's hot, she's eight legged, and she has the green's in heat.


Gone is doggie style, a favorite of mammals the world over, and since this is the secular left, so too is gone the missionary position. Green porn transcends the mere mamillian copulation that has stood the test of time and instead finds its libido in a new arena entirely - insect coitus. And the new Kama Insecta is being written by Isabella Rossellini:

Isabella Rossellini is showing her short film "Green Pornos" at this year's Berlinale. The movie, which was made for mobile phones, shows the actress dressed up as various insects doing what comes naturally.

"If I were a dragonfly," says Isabella Rossellini, "I would have compound eyes and could look up, down, back and forth at the same time. I would have a very skinny body and transparent wings." This simple statement marks the beginning of eight stories dealing with the sex lives of insects. But worse is yet to come, as these creatures usually have to pay for their casual flings -- often with their lives.

This is no obstacle for the actress and director, who plays eight different insects in her "Green Porno," short film and obviously enjoys depicting the coitus of fireflies and other insects. The eight one-minute episodes are both informative and amusing, showing plenty of interesting details on this somewhat unorthodox theme.

For example, houseflies have little time for physical love, as their lives are so short. Fireflies glide in loneliness through the night, hoping to attract a partner with their light. Snails are pretty much hermaphrodites, so whoever comes by tends to work out, while earthworms are fond of the so-called "69 position." Male honey bees seemingly have nothing to do but wait for their lucky chance. And the female praying mantis gives unsafe sex a whole new twist, as she tends to rip off her partner's head during the act of copulation. . . .

Read the article. Anything I might add would likely be inappropriate, for this blog at least.